When Do You Say No?

TipHero - Your Guide to Saving Money

Tip Hero serves up fresh money-saving tips daily,
with over 2,000 tips shared to date.

GET FREE UPDATES:

Tips by Category:

Q & A

Home > Q & A > Topics: Reader Submitted

-----------------------------------------

When Do You Say No?

Submitted by: GALE OSBORN 10/02/2009 9:52 AM

I really enjoyed the post about being frugal or cheap. now i would like to know when it's time to say no to those who are consistently asking for help. i'm having a real hard time. i am a people person and it gives me great pleasure to help the ones that need help. but, where do we draw the line and say no? should i ignore the acrylic nails and pedicured feet and smoking a cigarette???? oh, i forgot, talking on a very expensive cell phone. am i being hateful? i never had those things when i was too poor to afford them. if i'm being asked for money, is it any of my business what they spend theirs on???? i have a policy, borrow from me and pay it back, i'll loan it to you again. don't pay it back and i don't want to loan to you again.

I would like some other opinions about this. what do you think?? gale"

---
sponsored: Find Money Budgeting Tips.

---
Tip Hero serves up new money-saving tips daily.
Get free updates via Email , RSS or Twitter.

Comments:

.................................

All this new technology people think they need. But you must wait until the technology is affordable. Unless you use a computer for work or learning, then I see no need in them. People don't need cell phones unless they are away from other phones. If you're out on a boat they are nice to have, but if you just go to work and home I see no need for them. It's just another expense. There are so many ways to save money and avoiding all this new technology is one way. I mean do all these kids need these IPODS? It used to be pagers. Then cell phones and now IPODs. Most husbands and wives if the wife doesn't work don't need two cars. People can grow gardens and eliminate a huge expense. Women can stay home and tend to the garden and learn to make clothes. It's like we've come full circle. Now we're back to survival and going back to the old days of preserving food and making things. If you have enough property you could grow food and sell it.

Posted by anonymous on October 15, 2009 1:43 PM

.................................

Maybe a good compromise would be to offer your help in a way other than financial. You could make a casserole or babysit for free -- something along those lines. If they just want cash...you'd better think twice about that loan!

Good Luck!

Posted by Susan on October 24, 2009 9:14 PM

.................................

Well, we live and we learn. When someone asks for help, we try to help. When we see that they are spending money on things that we consider extras, it's disheartening. A family member came to us for money, a loan, awhile ago. He's almost fifty and been financially irresponsible all of his life. But,he was a family member in a jam. We gave him the money and in our own minds we never expected to get it back, (not what we told him).We haven't gotten it back. We also agreed before giving him the money to say no if he asks again. Our policy: only "loan" what you can afford to never get back, and don't expect to get it back.

Posted by anonymous on November 14, 2009 12:17 AM

.................................

I've been saying no for a few decades now and have a policy that I will either give something to someone that needs something I no longer use or I will sell it to them. I tell people up front that I don't "loan" anything out...selling something to someone makes them a little more responsible or they have the chance to say "no thanks", but it does make them think. Most of the time they decline and don't bother me again and you can find out that way if they're freeloaders or not.

Posted by anonymous on December 25, 2009 5:06 PM

.................................

-----------------------------------------

Share Your Comments:

Comments may need to be approved before they are displayed.

Comments:

Name (leave blank if you want to be anonymous):

Email Address (your email address will not be displayed):

Website URL (not required; please do not include "http://"):